One, Two, Three, Four, Nothing Fits Me Anymore

I have given in to the fact that not many of my pre-pregnancy clothes will be worn again until after the baby, so I cleaned out my closets and dresser. Everything is packed nicely into Rubbermaid storage containers until they fit again. It was a sad day, I even found some of my "bar tramp" clothes (at least that is what Jeff calls them). It was sad to see them go, I'm not even keeping those little camisoles and strapless tops, they are going to the resale shop tomorrow, some young girl will be thrilled to get them. I have a load of clothing that will be going to the Goodwill and about 80 pairs of underwear that I haven't worn in years that will be going into the trash.

We also started cleaning out the baby room. What a project. I'll post pictures later. I wish we hadn't junked it up so much, oh well, it will be clean soon.

Pregnancy Comments and Questions

Since becoming pregnant I've noticed some people think they need to ask you dumb questions or give dumb advice. Maybe they think they are being helpful, but really they are not, they are just annoying or maybe I'm just sick of hearing the same crap over and over again from different people. Here is my basic list of things I've heard about 1000 times:

1 - What are you craving?

2 - Wow, you don't look like you have gained much, you need to gain more. (NEWSFLASH, my weight gain is right on track)

3 - How are you feeling? (I realize this is harmless, but when you hear the question like 50 times a week it gets old)

4 - Should I be saving all my pink stuff for you?? (wink, wink) This is a sneaky question from others trying to trip me up to tell what I'm having.

5 - You HAVE to get drugs during labor. I had every drug they offered me and it was wonderful, I didn't even know I had a baby. (sure it was because you were high as a kite!, ok really I'm allergic to a lot of the pain meds given during childbirth so honestly I'm not sure what I can or want to take, I really don't want to break out in a rash, itch or feel like I just had 5 margaritas from El Camino while in labor)

6 - Are you going to breastfeed?? (seriously, this is kind of personal and the sad thing is I've been asked it like 100 times by people who really shouldn't be asking me that aka MEN! yeah, I know, weird)

7 - How many people are you going to have in the delivery room? (Hmmmm, let me think, myself, Jeff and whatever hospital staff needs to be there) I then get a perplexed look as though I'm crazy for not wanting to expose my crotch and ass to people who shouldn't be looking. I think I'll start telling people well, as long as I get to attend the next Pap test of whoever attends, feel free to watch. I'm just picturing some of these people with a grandstand of family members awaiting the arrival of the baby. I realize that grandmothers to be are very excited, but it is also my birth and my body and I'm very private, therefore I don't want visitors until AFTER the baby gets here.

8 - So, if you are not telling anyone the sex what am I supposed to buy you?? (hmmmm, I don't know, I didn't realize that babies needed an extensive wardrobe, maybe buy me a few bottles!)

22 Week Baby Bump!!

I haven't posted a baby bump picture since 17 weeks!!! I'm such a slacker. I promise to be better about this and at least post a new one every 2 weeks from now on.

I'm loving my designer matenity jeans, they don't even look like maternity jeans, do they???? I paid $115 for them at Mimi, but they were worth it. I ended up having them hemmed because I'm short and I swear every single pair of maternity jeans are meant for someone 5 inches taller than me.

Baby says: HAPPY TURKEY DAY!!!

Gobble, Gobble, Gobble!!!

We just wanted to wish everyone a Happy Turkey Day!! Enjoy all the yummy food!! Baby can't wait to try some of mommy's chocolate swirl cheesecake with an Oreo crust.

Weight Gain Log

I'm always curious as to how much women gain during pregnancy so I have decided to add to my blog a weight gain log. Enjoy!

Week in Review

This last week was a big week for us. We had the big ultrasound on Wednesday and yes we found out the sex and no we are not telling anyone. Neener, neener, neener! It will be revealed at the shower though, so hold your pants for another 2 months, you will find out January 25.

Everything looked great, the baby was measuring on the big side and the ultrasound tech told me the machine was giving her a due date a week earlier than what was originally thought. The doctor said that was not a reason to move the due date though because everyone is different and every baby grows at different rates. There are general guidelines as far as weight goes for what week you are in your pregnancy and they are meant as guides only. She said if my due date was anymore than 3 weeks off then it might be changed. So I've come to the conclusion the baby will either come earlier than expected or come late and be gigantic!

The baby was moving all over the place, he/she had it's hands in it's mouth, it was kicking up a storm, doing flips and it even turned it's head and looked at us!! I'm in love already :o) Jeff was ecstatic that he actually saw the baby for longer than 2 seconds since he was 30 minutes late to the 12 week scan. The tech spent about 30 minutes checking everything out and taking measurments so it was very cool we had that much time to look at the baby. I won't see the baby again until he/she is born though.

My weight gain as of 21 weeks is a whopping 9.5 lbs!!!! Not too shabby!! I really am hoping to keep the total weight gain to 20-25 lbs, but we will see. I workout 5 mornings a week and try my hardest to eat healthy, but sometimes I have to cave into those ice cream cravings.

What Are You Doing in There Baby?

Here is what I think you are doing when I feel you move if you are a boy:

1. Playing soccer
2. Hitting a baseball
3. Practicing passes with the football

Here is what I think you are doing when I feel you move if you are a girl:

1. Playing barbie
2. Styling your hair
3. Applying makeup

The other night Maizy was laying on my belly and you kicked her in the head, was that your way of saying watch out doggie because I'm taking over this house when I bust outta here.

Wednesday is my big ultrasound and we will be able to see you again, hopefully you are moving all around. We are hoping to find out if you are a boy or a girl but if we don't that is OK too. I should also let all my blog readers know that the sex will be kept a secret until the shower, if you come to my shower and I have blue cupcakes you will know the baby is a boy and if we have pink cupcakes that obviously means girl. If the cupcakes are some other color then you will know the baby didn't cooperate and we will be surprised at the delivery.

Non Baby Related Post

Next time I have to fly I'm having a t-shirt made that says:

"JUST PAY THE FUCKING BAGGAGE FEE FUCKOS!!!"

Seriously!!!!!! I'm so tired of flying and having all the idiots carry on bags that they know full well should be checked just to avoid the baggage fee. Then they all wonder why there is no overhead storage space anymore and can't figure out why the flight attendant is getting frustrated with them trying to shove a large suitcase into the overhead. Traffic getting on to the plane gets all backed up because of these idiots. Yes, it sucks that every single airline charges for bags now, but really when it comes down to it is $15 to check one bag really horrible. Is it worth causing all the problems you cause by trying to carry on bags too large??

Today I saw a couple that had 3 large bags they carried on. I have no idea how they got away with it either. She had a suitcase the size of the one I checked, he had a suitcase the size of the one I checked and they had a large duffel bag. They carried all of this on and you should have seen them trying to stuff it all into the overhead.

I realize that these unnecessary charges the airlines are imposing are completely ridiculous and maybe in some cases people just don't want to pay the extra fee to prove a point, but when you really look at it is $10 or $15 to check a bag too much to ask?? I know that plane tickets are expensive, but in the grand scheme of things the few extra dollars to check a bag cuts down on the problems this is causing. Hopefully the airlines wake up and realize how dumb it was of them to start these baggage fees. Why can't they just add a few bucks to each ticket, I doubt it will stop anyone from traveling.

Have You Not Read the Dear Non-Pregnant Person Letter??

We have employees that live elsewhere in the U.S. and I saw one of them for the first time since becoming pregnant yesterday. He looked at me and said "Are you having twins??" Gah!!!!! I'm not that big!!!!! I should have printed that letter for him.

Pregnancy Weight Gain

I decided to brave the scale Sunday morning. I was still only 9 lbs. up from my pre-pregnancy weight, so that means my weight hasn't change since my last appointment almost 4 weeks ago. I was happy with that. Jeff thought it wasn't enough weight gain, so I informed him that 1/2 lb. per week was the recommended weight gain and according to that I'm right on track. I'm not sure how much weight he thinks I should gain, is it possible he wants me to look like an Orca Whale????

Last Out of Town Trip for Work!!!

This is semi-baby related since I'm quitting my job to be a stay at home mom. I left this morning for Bow, New Hampshire and will return Friday. This is my last out of town trip for work. It is sort of bittersweet. I love New Hampshire, this has always been my favorite place to visit for work, it is gorgeous here and my favorite restaurant is here too. I'll miss that food, but being home with my little one will be better than that food. I have approximately 4 months left at my job and I secretly can't wait to be done. I've tentatively set my last day for March 13, but that may change as I get later into the pregnancy.

I had a follow up to my recent UTI with the OB yesterday, I just peed in a cup to make sure it was gone. I had two UTIs in a row and was paranoid so I asked for a urinalysis. Well, it is gone!!!! I did get to hear the heartbeat, it was 149, the doctor stated again that it was a boy heartbeat. She must be into the old wives tales.

Need a Good Laugh

Check out what our baby will look like, I was laughing so hard I nearly peed myself. He even has Jeff's receding hairline. The pictures I used were from our wedding, I was drinking champagne straight from the bottle and Jeff had my garter around his head. Maybe the baby looks drunk because we were.

Dear Non-Pregnant Person

Dear Non-Pregnant Person,

I hope you find these guidelines helpful in your interactions with pregnant women as failing to follow them may result in serious physical harm.

If you are thinking, surely she doesn't mean me, then you should probably read this twice.

1) The appropriate response to a couple telling you they are having a baby is "Congratulations!" with enthusiasm.

Any other response makes you an ass!

2) Through the wonders of science, we now know that babies are made ONLY by the mother and father, not grandparents. Unless the baby is in your uterus or you are the man that helped put it there, you may not ever use the phrase "my baby".

3) On the same note, unless you made the baby as defined in #2, the pregnancy, birth and raising of the child are not about you. You do not have input. No one wants to hear your opinion unless they ask for it. The same goes for the name of the baby.

4) The body of a pregnant women should be treated the same as any other body. You would not randomly touch someone's stomach if they were not pregnant, nor would you inquire into the condition of their uterus,cervix or how they plan to use their breasts. Pregnancy does not remove all traces of privacy from a woman.

5) Likewise, no woman wants to hear comments on her weight, ever. A pregnant woman does not find it flattering that you think she is about is pop, must be having twins, looks swollen or has gained weight in her face. Telling her she looks too small only makes her worry that she is somehow starving her baby. Making such comments invite her to critique your physical appearance and you may not act offended. The only acceptable comment on appearance is "You look fabulous!".

6) By the time we are 20-30 years old, most of us have picked up on the fact that the summer is hot. We are hot every summer when we are not pregnant. We don't need you to point out that we will be miserably hot before the baby comes.

7) There is a reason that tickets to the labor & delivery floor of the hospital are not yet sold on Ticketmaster. Childbirth is actually not a public event. It may sound crazy, but some women really do not relish the idea of their mother, MIL or a host of other family members seeing their bare butt and genitals. Also, some people simply feel like the birth of their child is a private and emotional moment to be shared only by the parents. Like everything else in life, unless you receive an invitation, you are NOT invited. This includes doctor appointments, ultrasounds, labor, delivery, the hospital and the parents home. You do not decide if you will be there for the birth or if you will move in with the new parents to "help out". If your assistance is desired, rest assured that you will be asked for it.

8) If you are asked to help after the birth, this means you should cleanup the house, help with cooking meals, and generally stay out of the way. Holding the baby more than the parents, interfering with breastfeeding and sleeping schedules and making a woman who is still leaking fluid from multiple locations lift a finger in housework is not helping.

9) The only people entitled to time with the baby are the parents. Whether they choose to have you at the hospital for the birth or ask for you to wait three weeks to visit, appreciate that you are are being given the privilege of seeing their child. Complaining or showing disappointment only encourages the parents to include you less. I hope this helps, it sure makes us feel better.

Signed,

All Pregnant Women

Must.Stop.Craving.Cake Batter.Ice Cream

Seriously, Jeff will think I've lost my mind if I ask for $10 ice cream again tonight. I'm sensing a run to Kroger though for a $3 half gallon of something though. Or maybe a pint of Ben & Jerry's Cherry Garcia. Someone please talk me down from the ledge.

Follow Up to My Craving

We went to Coldstone and I got my usual, cake batter ice cream with M&Ms mixed in and a chocolate coated waffle cone bowl. It was pure heaven and I think the baby enjoyed it as well.

My First Real Craving

I'm having a major craving for ice cream tonight even though I'm freezing cold right now. Jeff has agreed to take me to Coldstone for some ice cream, but only if we can stop at Target on the way home so he can shop. I agreed, of course.